No, not that Right, your other Rite. 

Ah, screw it.  Just make three lefts and while you wait for oncoming
traffic I'll passive aggressively stew here with my shotgun and whistle
tunelessly.

Do I stress you out?

Oh, you don't even know.

Le Sacre du printemps

Allow me to review the 3 Rules of Opera-

The 3 rules of Opera.

1. It must be long, boring, and in an incomprehensible foreign language (even if that language is English).
2. The characters, especially the main ones, must be thoroughly unsympathetic and their activities horrid and callous.
3. Everyone must die, hopefully in an ironic and gruesome way.

Ballet is the same, but with more men in tights and without the superfluous singing.

I'm not afraid if the Terpsichorean Muse though I do like a nice bit of cheese-

I was a DJ after all and I know what (shudder) drags them out on the dance floor and it ain't this-

You see, people only dance to the thoroughly familiar and cliched.

Those are ones I actually like.

Anyway the story of the Ballet goes something like this, the
celebration of spring begins in the hills and a Crone enters to foretell
the future which isn't really even as interesting as a cold reading
because this is a simpler, more primitive time and every Groundhog Day
is pretty much exactly the same.

What would you do if you were stuck in one place and every day was exactly the same, and nothing that you did mattered?

That about sums it up for me.

Except that today is different. Today we go and kidnap us some virgins. I dunno, I kind of agree with that part about the railroad tracks.

And then we celebrate Festivus with the airing of grievances until the Sage comes and tells us to stop it and get on to the orgy.

End of Act I. Time to hit the lobby and get blasted because things are only going to get worse.

Act II

Evidently the ballerinas were out in the lobby too as they straggle on stage and wander around in circles for no particular reason. It's just like a Sigma Alpha Epsilon party at UVA only with more roofies. One particularly befuddled co-ed is selected for sacrifice, sent off to perform goodness knows what kind of unspeakable acts with a bunch of dirty old men and then dances herself to death much to the amusement of the other performers and outrage of the audience.

Curtain

Yeah, dance your way out of that Stravinsky.

As you might imagine this tale of pedophilic murder created quite a stir, even in Paris a city not noted for Puritanism. At the debut there was a riot between the wealthy patrons of art and the bohemian hip crowd that liked it for it's novelty. From all accounts Nijinsky's choreography sucked, but I think the whole concept was a bad idea from the git.

Despite my opinion it's one of the most frequently recorded and performed ballets.

Oh wait, that's Shirley Jackson's The Lottery. This is Le Sacre.

Don't agree with my assessment? Well, that's the Politics of Dancing-

Obligatories, News and Blogs below.