Mimi Lemay is a writer and a blogger, a married mother of three. At the end of February, Mimi wrote A Letter to my Son Jacob on his 5th Birthday

Mimi was interviewed by Robin Young on WBUR's Here and Now yesterday.

On learning that her child was transgender:

It was a very painful experience for me and I wanted to bring it out, because I think a lot of parents are afraid to transition their children, because they fear they will be seen as bad parents. I have heard this from parents who have gone through the transition. They’ve said the first and the worst thing about it — other than losing their son or daughter as I felt — was the way people looked at me. Suddenly, I went from being a great mom to being a terrible mom.

Why did she let her son transition?

I saw that my child was lost. I realized that living two divided lives — one at school, one at home — was creating a schism in who she was, and she was not whole.

We were trying to prevent the harm we saw happening. We didn’t expect him to suddenly on a dime turn around and become a different person, a happier person.

He started laughing openly, huge guffaws. He started standing up tall and looking in people’s eyes. And the barking and the loping and the tongue hanging out, and all those odd antisocial behaviors he had had previously fell away within the first two weeks [of the transition].

On raising a transgender child:

Realizing how happy he was and how whole he was becoming made me realize that this was not a curse. This is an opportunity to raise a unique child, a very deep child. And he is part of a community that is right now suffering, badly. But I believe that awareness will at least prompt them to learn more, will let them see that transgender children are out there and being treated brutally by society in many instances, and that needs to change.

Quotes from her letter to Jacob:

There was an un-childlike, persistent sadness that lay about you like a pall in those years, which should have been so magical.

You weren’t confused. You knew where you belonged. You just didn’t know how to get there. What if it was I who was responsible for showing you the way?

I believe in the goodness of people. And I believe in your ability to dispel much of the ignorance and intolerance in those you may encounter.

For I have seen and wish to share remarkable things. In those early days as Jacob, I saw the most authentic parts, in the deepest reaches of you, begin to unfold. I saw you take your first huge breaths. I saw the clouds above your head scatter and run. At first there was a silence, as you paused to take in the new world around you, and then you roared: I AM HERE!! It was then that I realized that we had indeed met before, but that truly I had not recognized you that first time. It was then that my grief began to depart, as I knew in my soul that you had always been my son, Jacob.